8 Relationship Myths that Can Seriously Damage Your Marriage

by Brittany Wong, Divorce Editor, The Huffington Post

Maintaining a marriage is hard enough without having to adhere to certain "rules" or "truths"about relationships from magazines and people you know. 

With that in mind, we asked relationship experts to share a few myths about relationships that get under their skin. See what they had to say below.

Myth #1: Never go to bed angry.

The big problem with this time-honored advice? It's based on the premise that marital discord of any kind is  unsustainable and unhealthy, when the truth is, hashing out your problems and clearing the air can lead to a stronger relationship, said Amanda Deverich, a Williamsburg, Virginia-based marriage and family therapist. Go to bed if you don't have the mental energy to talk; you'll probably be better equipped to discuss your problems in the AM once you've slept, she added.

"Never going to bed angry could elevate a fight and reduce the ability for a couple to resolve the issue -- and it could be particularly harmful  when couples have a 'pursue and withdraw' dynamic; In other words, one person is the pursuer who's driven to re-establish connection and resolve the fight while the other partner withdraws from the argument because they are emotionally flooded and tired,"she explained. "In this case, go to bed angry. A partner who tends to withdraw needs time and distance to calm down to be able to reengage in the discussion."

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Marissa GandelmanComment