The Art of Being Selfish

by Allyson Schurtz for Elephant Journal

Becoming an adult has proven to be a challenge for me to say the least.

My [significant] quarter-life crisis came at the cost of a few relationships, several relocations and a successful career.

I’ve come to find that one of the most beautiful aspects of maturing is the freedom that comes with self-awareness. With that self-exploration process, I have also often struggled with walking the line between selfishness and self-care.

It’s a theme I see with a lot of the people in my life. Decisions are made based on an inability to separate those two very different concepts.

As a woman, I find it especially challenging because we are hard-wired to nurture and care for others. Too many times I have found myself feeling utterly depleted because the guilt I felt for not appeasing others’ expectations took precedent over my own wants and needs. However, I have learned how unsustainable that is. I have concluded that in order to be fully present and engaged in my relationships with others, self-care must be a top priority.

There is a stark difference between being selfish and self-care. To have a healthy, well-balanced, life it is not only okay, but it’s necessary to make yourself a priority. And you don’t have to feel guilty for doing so.

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Marissa GandelmanComment