The Buddhist Notion of Love

via Waylon Lewis for Elephant Journal

“But let there be spaces in your togetherness
and let the winds of the heavens dance between you. Love one another but
make not a bond of love:
let it rather be a moving sea
the shores of your souls.”
~ Kahlil Gibran

I’m in love with a woman I’ve never met.

But we do know each other. And one thing she said that I love is that

“being in love is of secondary importance”

…she said it in response to my concerns about our future hypothetical love, marriage and baby carriage.

She said,

“I don’t need to go on a lifelong romantic picnic—I have things to do”

I loved her for saying that. I’ve always thought fun was fun…for an hour or so. Then, fun is boring. You know what’s always fun? Serving the greater good by doing something you’re good at. Whether that’s dance or teaching or politicking or working the counter at a corner store or being a nurse or what.

The kind of love I’ve been brought up to look for isn’t a lifeong picnic. It’s a partnership, with loneliness built in.

Read more

Marissa GandelmanComment